Excuse my langauge.

Guys, I fear that I am attempting to do the impossible. How could I, a mere ADHD-ridden individual, manage to get my butt into gear and finish a freaking book?

I love writing. I love drafting. I love outlining. And yet, I struggle to finish pretty much anything, be it book or short story or flash fiction piece. I have tons of in-progress projects, including three novels with actual starts and outlines, a myriad of One of my goals for 2026 was to finish Fae Marked by the end of June, and I’m worried that this won’t come to pass.

Hi. I wrote the above paragraph in April. It is now the middle of May, and I am even more certain that I won’t finish my first draft by the end of June. But I think that’s okay. Why? Because I’m so gosh-darned busy! Some days, work has loads of free time that I can use to write. Other days, I need to be extremely hands on with the classes that I work with and I have barely any time to even write my sub notes. On top of that, I’ve had job interviews, trips, busy weekends, and now a MOVE of all things to be ready for! I have every right to make some excuses. I’d feel worse if I wasn’t writing at all, but the last few months I’ve been decently consistent in hitting/nearly hitting 20,000 words for my writing. Now, a lot of that is for articles, but these still get my creative juices flowing so I don’t mind too much.

But let me in on a little secret. Even if I did have all the time in the world, I don’t think I’d finish Fae Marked. I’m not totally sure why, but I have a block when it comes to my novels right now. I don’t think I’ve touched any of my three projects in like, maybe months. Again, this could be because life likes to get in the way, or it could be because I simply just don’t feel like it. I try not to force myself to work on things that I don’t feel like doing, since I worry it hinders my creative processing, but does there come a point that I need to get my butt in gear and force myself to finish something?

My dad is an artist, so growing up I would do a ton of art with him. He explained to me a concept that I think applies to almost every artistic form. There comes a point in every project where you hate what you’re doing and think everything is awful. But if you can push beyond that stage, you can come out feeling better than ever about your piece of art. But that never happens if you shelf it for later.

Is that my problem? Is that why I’ve never finished a full draft before? Do I get stuck in this phase where thigs are rough and not coming together and decide to call it quits, citing the need for a break?

I’m so close to getting Fae Marked done I can almost taste it. I think I’m at the 2/3 point, which is the furthest I’ve ever made it in a project. Most of my other novels are sitting at a few chapters written, but rough outlines fully completed. I would love to finally have something fully completed after my years of trying.

I don’t know what to do. There are all these ideas of being a planner or a pantser when it comes to writing. I’m very much a planner. I’ve been thinking for a while now that I need to get back to my outlines and start laying out an emotional plot line, so I can track who feels what and when. It’s hard to do a book centered on character relationships when you aren’t sure where they’re at! Maybe this is what I need to do, or perhaps I need to do some skipping around just to have more on the page. I’m not sure.

I look at people like Ava who can spit out projects like no one’s business and I marvel at that talent. I know that my talents are different, but boy is it rude! I think that perhaps part of what works so well for Ava is that she lets herself have many many different projects. I’ve been trying to limit myself on my novel projects, but maybe that needs to change?

I finished a short story last week, which is a miracle in and of itself. I sent it to Ava for a quick once-over, and she told me to make it into a full length novel! At least she liked it. I think I enjoy it as is, and want to start submitting it around soon, but we tossed some ideas around and now I have maybe a good idea brewing that I need to start. Maybe this will get me back into the novel writing mindset? And even if it isn’t Fae Marked, it is long form writing, which I’ve been slacking on.

Goal one: Finish three short stories.

Wait, Saige, you may be asking yourself. Didn’t you just say you wanted to work on long form projects again? Why are you saying you want to do short stories?

Well, dear reader. I want to make sure I have something that I can work on and finish while during the busiest and least productive months of the year. I do most of my writing at work. I barely do any writing on the weekends. Summer is basically one big weekend when you’re in the education field, so it could be a real struggle for me to get anything done. Having the goal of a few short stories will hopefully give me the motivation to do something, with the added bonus of having more short stories to submit and maybe put into a collection.

Goal two: write 15k words a month

Currently, I’m writing around 20k words a month. Like I said above, I know this will go down. A lot. I still want to push myself. If I average 500 words a day, I get easily hit 15k. The next goal I think will help me with this.

Goal three: create a dedicated writing time

It doesn’t need to be daily, it doesn’t need to be super regular, but I think I need to try and build a time into my week to bang out some words. Maybe I’ll try to do this in the mornings. Maybe the job I get during the summer will have some time where I can write. Maybe I can do writing sessions with Ava since we’ll finally be living in the same town. I think no matter when I do it, I will benefit from setting aside a dedicated time to work on my writing.

Goal four: work on the outline for Fae Marked

Here we go, the actual novel goal. Like I said above, I think I’m at the point where I need more concrete plans to really nail the last third of the book. If I want to hit the right emotional beats, I need to plan those out! So by the end of summer, I want a revamped outline that maybe will help me finish the first draft by the end of the year. Maybe.

Perhaps one day I’ll discover the secret I’m missing and will finally finish a first draft! The secret is probably to rush through it and make it better once it exists, but I’ve always been bad at doing that. The curse of being a perfectionist and a procrastinator. Sigh.

There’s hope for me yet! If you’re like me and struggle to finish things you start, you’re not alone. Let’s just keep at it until we stumble our way into completion.

That’s what she said.

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