If you missed last week’s article, I started a re-watch/dissection of all the Conjuring movies and their related films. I’m continuing with my reviews this week, beginning with 2021’s The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It. I’m going in release order for my watch, and that’s where we left off last week (this was originally going to be one post, but it was like 6,000 words, so I had to cut it in half!).
Again, I will not be giving outright spoilers, but I will be discussing the connections between the films and general plot outlines. If you haven’t seen these movies yet and want to go in blind, I recommend doing so before continuing with this article. Otherwise, let’s hop right in!
I would like to quickly note (in case you didn’t read Part 1) that it’s general knowledge now that the Warrens were pretty much confirmed to be frauds and that Ed was rumored to be kind of a shit bag. I’d like to reinforce that I am focusing on the fictional Ed & Lorraine portrayed in these movies, not the real couple.
The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021)
Rating: 9 / 10
Ed & Lorraine must dig backwards in a possession case to save a young man from death row.
Given the fact that this franchise is about the case files of the Warrens, we’ve seen irritatingly little of them since The Conjuring 2. I actually love anytime they’re actively involved with the movie’s plot: the way they’re portrayed as level-headed, knowledgeable, and very much in love makes them a joy to have as part of whichever movie’s ka-tet (Dark Tower reference, deal with it). Both of their actors are very talented and I think the way Ed is portrayed is just so sweet. So, given that our main pair is literally on the movie poster, I was excited and ready to check back in with our favorite demonologist duo.
I was not disappointed.
Starting at the opening scene, I loved the kid bending impossibly- very creepy and the effect actually looked pretty good. Arne was an absolute sweetheart from the very beginning, and I actually got chills when he begged the demon to go into him instead.
I absolutely loved the little backstory Lorraine gives of the day she met Ed. I’m sure it’s not the actual Warrens’ story, but I’m very glad that they’re continually emphasizing how much in love they are and always have been.
We’re gonna talk about Arne for a bit now.
I loved him from the first shot of his face. Not only is he adorable, but he’s perfectly vulnerable and his actor did an amazing job. Let’s look at him for a minute.
He’s what Bob from Annabelle Comes Home wishes he could be.
I loved the scene with Bruno and how we weren’t sure if what Arne was seeing was real or not. Very good manipulation of the audience. It kept me guessing during a lot of his scenes. I think Ruairi’s best scene, though, was at the end of act one, where he’s walking down the road after the shit goes down. The way his face shifts from cold impassivity to terrified and sickened is just so freaking good. I just wanted to hug him when he said, “I think I hurt someone.”
As you can already tell by the length of this review, I really enjoyed this movie.
What made this installment so refreshing was the reversal of the usual structure for a haunting/possession movie: we started with an exorcism and possession and its results, then we worked backwards and dug for the cause of the original possession. It was a very unique way to approach a case, and it almost felt a bit Criminal Minds-y when Ed & Lorraine went out investigating the origins of the events. On that note- it really melted my heart the way Ed is constantly seeking to protect Lorraine, even given the malady that plagues him for the whole film.
Side note: Lorraine is an absolute badass. I would never go into a crawlspace without at least a pair of gloves. Geez.
Another thing I noticed about this one’s structure is it really leaned away from the usual jump scare rhythm. Not to say there weren’t jump scares, but they weren’t the skeleton of every single freaking scene like in Annabelle Comes Home (I hate that movie more the more I think about it).
This is already really long, so I’m just gonna rapid fire some more things I liked:
- -Drew (I want a spinoff starring him)
- -“I have chicken shit on my hands”
- -Big walking corpse guy
- -Parallel of Arne & Ed during the big confrontation
- -Lorraine’s locket
- -Real footage during the credits
- -reappearance of the theme score from other Conjuring movies
If you’re intimidated by the sheer number of installments in this universe, I recommend at least checking out the main “Conjuring” titles. So far none of them have been misses for me.
The Nun II (2023)
Rating: 5.5 / 10
Sister Irene must travel to France when she learns that the demon she faced in Romania still has its hooks in Frenchie.
When I told our friend Olivia how much I enjoyed The Nun, she said something to the effect of “I’m very surprised that they made The Nun II“. Which made me a little nervous going in.
And… eh.
There were things to like about this movie, but a lot of things that got me pretty bored.
The main difference between this one and The Nun was the kind of story we’re telling. The Nun was absolutely a Gothic tale, with limited cast and an isolated setting. I thought it was the perfect way to tell such a creepy story. This story was told quite differently.
We’re given quite a few characters to care about here, and many of them either fall flat or aren’t memorable. I was mostly disappointed in the wasted potential of Storm Reid’s character, Sister Debra.
Now, I’ve loved Storm Reid since The Last of Us. She gives a wonderfully nuanced and sincere performance, especially given her young age. She’s gorgeous, charismatic, and talented.
And she just… did nothing the whole movie. Like, the writers gave her absolutely nothing to work with. I kept thinking, “Okay, soon she’s gonna do something besides just follow Sister Irene around.” And it just… never happened. Like, all she did was pray with Irene at the end during the big confrontation. They even put her with the girls of the orphanage in a (way too drawn-out) chase scene with Valak, and still, she just didn’t do fucking anything. Just screamed and ran with the girls. No heroic act to protect anyone, no smart outwitting of the demon aside from barring a door with a convenient 2×4. Seriously, why is there always a 2×4 next to a set of double doors that you close while running from a demon? I swear this happens all the time.
Debra was seemingly set up as a kind of protege for Irene, but she never gets to grow or do anything of her own agency. She could’ve just not been in the movie and it would’ve made almost no difference. Which is a huge bummer, because Storm Reid absolutely could’ve stolen this show away.
While we’re on the topic of things that didn’t work for me, there was a lot of filler in this movie. I honestly believe that if you’d just started around the scene where Irene & Debra visit the archive building and start getting Saint Lucy lore, you wouldn’t miss anything at all.
Enough of the negativity. It’s time for the things I did like.
- The scene where Irene watches all those magazines flapping in the wind to make the image of The Nun
- Maurice (Frenchie) in general, he’s so cute and lovable
- The scene where the headmistress is killed- some rare gore for this franchise, well done
- How they flipped the roles of Irene and Frenchie from the last movie’s climax
- Irene being a total badass at the end
My biggest issue with this movie (aside from the egregious amount of filler scenes and slow movement in the entire first half) was that we kind of know by the end that nothing that happened in this movie actually mattered for Frenchie in the end. We were pointedly directed to pay attention to that clip from the very first Conjuring movie where Frenchie is being exorcised on camera. He’s described as having ultimately shot his wife and then himself as a result of the possession. This is not a spoiler, since it’s a clip shown in a movie ten years before this one. So… why should we care about any of these stakes?
We don’t feel any sort of urging for the demon to be expelled from Frenchie because we know it doesn’t happen, and that Frenchie ultimately dies as a result of this possession. So what was the point of this entire movie if we know none of it makes any difference in the end? I suppose it sets up him meeting the wife he eventually shoots and kills, but like, why? This movie was essentially just to fill in missing information.
Don’t get me wrong, I started having a much better time with this movie after the second half, but it really just felt like lore-wise, we didn’t really need it at all.
Knowing absolutely nothing about any further Conjuring films, I’m theorizing that they’re planning to show us Frenchie one more time, this time with Ed & Lorraine getting involved. I kind of hope it’s just a side segment of a future movie; I can’t imagine they could make an entire other Nun movie out of what they’ve got left without it being mostly filler.
For how much I liked The Nun, I would honestly recommend casual viewers to treat it like a standalone. It was a perfectly contained story on its own, and it ended in a nice place that felt satisfying for everyone. So, Olivia, your warning stands true: I kind of wish they hadn’t made The Nun II.
The Conjuring: Last Rites (2025)
Rating: 7.5 / 10
Ed & Lorraine are reluctantly called back into the field when their daughter, Judy, feels a connection to a case.
I rejoiced in The Devil Made Me Do It that we finally got a lot more of Ed & Lorraine, and this movie only added to that enjoyment of their characters.
First, I want to say that the actress who plays adult Judy, Mia Tomlinson, is absolutely adorable and the complete girl-next-door. I’m actually a fan of the subplot with her getting engaged to her boyfriend, Tony.
A lot of what this movie seems to be doing is “passing the torch”. Not only do we see Judy grown up and acting of her own volition, even going so far as to be involved with her parents’ work, but we also see her at the beginnings of starting her own family. Judy and Tony definitely feel like “the new Ed & Lorraine” here, and I really wouldn’t be surprised if further Conjuring installments follow these two instead, Lorraine and Ed peacefully retired.
There were a few scenes that I really liked here. First, the ping pong scene. Way too cute. Ed playing against his future son-in-law to “Let’s Dance” while symbolically representing the struggle they’re soon to enter into over Judy? Great stuff. Second, I love how the start of the big climax was mirrored with the movie’s first scene with Judy’s birth. Biggest “god damn, that’s great stuff” came when Judy was at the dress shop, though. That little mirror room with the hundreds of her own reflection? Genius. The way just one of the reflections of her wasn’t quite matching up? Chilling.
As for the last twenty minutes or so, I’m not ashamed to admit I cried. The mainline Conjuring movies have this strange way of making us suddenly incredibly emotional at the end when it’s a goddamn paranormal horror movie. I think that’s part of the magic of these movies. If you go back and really think about the message of each mainline Conjuring installment, you see a pattern: love always beats the evil. It’s a lot like the way Stephen King villains are often so easily beaten: he always says “evil defeats itself”, which I think is a sentiment these writers have always been going for. Love is stronger than darkness, no matter how obliterating darkness may appear.
I know, I’m so poignant. I should probably mention the things I didn’t like as much so you understand that 7.5 / 10 rating.
I know this is a dumb nitpick, but when I saw that the cursed object for this one was a mirror, I got really excited. I thought we were doing an Oculus kind of thing. I know, I don’t have to bring Mike Flanagan into everything. But still, you see big creepy mirror and you think Oculus. Also, though it was really nice that this movie focused on family and specifically maternal love, there was just something about this plot and vibe that just didn’t hit as hard as The Devil Made Me Do It. The more I write about these films, the more I think that might be my favorite Conjuring installment.
Despite those few things, I really did have a good time here. It just didn’t have that extra-special shine to it that TDMMDI and The Nun had.
I understand if you want to be done at this point. But, here’s the thing.
As I composed this article, I found out something. There are two films that are not main franchise installments, but are made by/starring people involved with The Conjuring, and they borrow a few side characters from Annabelle. Since I just love horror movies so much and I am as curious as a cat, I decided I’d watch those too.
I’m not done with you yet, reader.
Wolves at the Door (2016)
Rating: 2/10
This movie was directed by John R. Leonetti, the director of Annabelle. It was written by Gary Dauberman, who wrote Annabelle, Annabelle: Creation, The Nun, and Annabelle Comes Home. Our character connection is Detective Clarkin from Annabelle.
Some people get stalked and murdered by the Manson Family.
I think you already know how I felt about this movie.
Gary Dauberman, what the fuck?
You ever watch a movie so bad that you have to tell someone about it as you’re witnessing the atrocity? My poor group chat had to listen to me rant about this thing for an hour.
Now, I will preface this with one caveat: I am (multiple times admittedly) not a slasher fan. And this is a slasher movie. BUT. I have enjoyed slashers. Nightmare on Elm Street, Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer. I’m not completely closed off to them.
This movie made me want to buy the DVD just so I could throw it in a blender.
What I’m going to do in the interest of honesty is this: the rest of this review will be transcribed exactly as I typed in my notes app as I was watching. Enjoy.
It’s a little unclear who these main characters are to each other
Why exactly would the cultists move her dress around to fuck with her?
Got so tired of watching people walk slowly through the house after seeing something
Sooo there’s some girl neither of you recognize acting outright creepy and you just… close the door? How are you not concerned over who the fuck that was?
Also, why is the blonde girl pregnant? It adds nothing to the story and it’s just distracting because it’s just a bone-thin actress wearing a very fake baby belly
*Sounds of a man clearly being stabbed* “What was that?”
I should’ve kept track of how long this loop went for: sudden noise from another room, walk agonizingly slow through the house while looking scared, quick sighting of weird person, different sudden noise from different room, repeat. (note: remind anyone of Annabelle Comes Home?)
Why is the girl poorly trying to strangle the brunette when the others all have knives?
The blonde’s acting gets really bad once she starts crying and begging
“Don’t. Please.” as she just sits there and does nothing to arm herself or run
Love the blonde being dragged through the hallway and crying and she’s BARELY EVEN KICKING HER LEGS??? THE ONLY WAY SHE’S RESTRAINED IS THE GIRL HOLDING HER HANDS. GIRL FIGHT BACK YOU’RE APPARENTLY PREGNANT
EVEN THE GUY!!! HE’S NOT EVEN KICKING HIS LEGS OR FIGHTING, HE’S JUST YELLING
Neither of them are restrained in any way and the door isn’t even locked. Girl just go?
This guy is apparently French? (note: I’m still not sure) That’s how bad his accent is
I laughed out loud when he tripped on the phone cord
“Let me just stand here and watch them stab him instead of using him as a distraction to run away”
WHAT WAS THAT STABBING? SHE JUST STABBED HER AND THEY STARED AT EACH OTHER FOR A MINUTE AND THEN SHE JUST WALKED AWAY? AND SHE LET HER??? WHAT WHAT WHAT
“Oh he’s not gonna save me, he clearly has a bloody sledgehammer. How about I just cry and get on my knees in the middle of the road to make his job easier?”
Somehow the locket’s fallen off of her in the road despite no struggle? And it happened to land open where she could look at it?
The little montage of real footage at the end does NOT make it a good movie (note: the montage of Family footage at the end was scarier than the entire movie)
In essence, this was just an insufferable slasher with idiots for main characters and villains that weren’t scary. The Manson Family murders are such an eerie concept and a great movie could’ve been made out of them but instead we just got this trash. The only reason it’s a 2/10 instead of a 1/10 is that it wasn’t very long.
The Curse of La Llorona (2019)
Rating: N/A
This film was directed by Michael Chaves, director of The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It, The Nun II, and The Conjuring: Last Rites. Our character connection is Father Perez from Annabelle.
Alright. Here’s the thing.
This is the last movie I watched for this article. Picture yourself eleven movies deep, your brain absolutely turned to mush, each shot of a person walking slowly through a house drawn by a creepy noise only makes you want to scream.
Then you get to this movie, which does absolutely nothing new and follows every recipe ever established.
I’m sorry, guys. I couldn’t do it.
I quit 30 minutes in. This movie gave me absolutely no reasons to continue watching it. And I realized that I could do better things with my Sunday than half-watch a boring ass movie while trying to entertain myself on my phone.
Sorry if you liked this one, but I like to be honest on here, and this is when I gave up.
In Summary
These posts took me four months to write, and at this point, I’m completely spent. I can’t watch another paranormal horror movie for at least a few weeks. Thank god we have people branching out and doing totally new things the past few years (Sinners, Backrooms, Weapons, etc). If this brand of paranormal horror was all I had to choose from as a horror movie fan, I think I’d give up on the genre.
Don’t get me wrong, I had a lot of fun with some of these. But the further in I got, the more I recognized the patterns, and the more sick of them I got.
So, in summary, I’m now going to rank all the movies I’ve discussed in the past two weeks.
10. Wolves at the Door
9. Annabelle Comes Home
8. The Nun II
7. The Conjuring II
6. Annabelle: Creation
5. The Conjuring: Last Rites
4. The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It
3. Annabelle (#4 and #3 were VERY close)
2. The Nun
1. The Conjuring
I’ve also seen that another Conjuring movie is on its way to us, and now that I’m fully caught up and in the zeitgeist, I can confidently say that I’ll be seeing it in theaters when it comes.
What do you think of this franchise? Are you also sick of the formula of these movies? Do you prefer Annabelle or The Nun? Do you think I’m a total asshole for hating a movie you liked, or a complete idiot for liking a movie you thought was trash?
Monthly Writing Goals Update
12,825 / 20,000 words
Not much to update this week. Most of what I’ve written has been just me working on that fall project I mentioned last week. It’s going great, and I’m very excited for it.
Cross your fingers that I start getting responses to some of the queries and submissions I shot out in June!
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